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The CRE Humor Jokes

When TI Budgets Ghost You and CAM Recs Ask for a Kidney

Expectation: TI done in 8 weeks Reality: permit fairy on PTO and GC says Q4-ish šŸ˜µā€šŸ’« Lender: need final budget Me: uploading change order 17 for the door that became a demising wall Client: why did CAM jump 22% Me: snow removal in July and common area now includes Mars Excel: 7.1% yield on cost DSCR: hold my beer 🄲

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CAM Season: The Spreadsheet Hunger Games

Broker: It's NNN, tenant covers CAM Reality Me in March: Cool, so why does trash removal have a sequel and a spin-off? Lender: Send the CAM backup Me: Here's a 97-tab Excel, 4 pivots, and one VLOOKUP

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