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The CRE Humor Jokes

When the Lender Opens My 'Pro-Forma-ish' Pro Forma

Aug 18
1 min read

Broker: It’s a rock-solid 7-cap Lender: Cool—send rent roll, T-12, T-3, T-1, and a blood sample Me in Excel: =IF(optimism, NOI*1.15, #VALUE!) 🧮 Appraiser: Found a comp from 2009… calls it a 5.1-cap Client: So we still at 80% LTV with no recourse, right? 😂

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