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The CRE Humor Jokes

My Excel Says 6 Cap; Lender Says New DSCR, Who Dis?

ricklahkar
May 14
1 min read

Me underwriting at 2am: shave 10 bps off exit cap and boom, IRR hits influencer levels Lender 9am: cute; bump to 1.35x DSCR, no IO, add TI/LC reserves and a springing lockbox Seller noon: price firm, roll me your estoppels, and BTW taxes reset like a SpaceX launch IC 3pm: show T-3, T-12, and T-who-hurt-you; Excel: #VALUE! fan screaming like a turbine 😵‍💫

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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