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The CRE Humor Jokes

Client Says 'Minor TI'—GC Sends a SpaceX Bid

Client: 'Minor TI, like paint and vibes' GC: $1.2M change order for moving an outlet + discovering zero HVAC tonnage Me: TI allowance ≠ building a WeWork in a 1973 warm dark shell 😬 City: Permit in 10 days* *where days are measured on Mars 🚀

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CAM Season: The Spreadsheet Hunger Games

Broker: It's NNN, tenant covers CAM Reality Me in March: Cool, so why does trash removal have a sequel and a spin-off? Lender: Send the CAM backup Me: Here's a 97-tab Excel, 4 pivots, and one VLOOKUP

 
 
 

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