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The CRE Humor Jokes

Broker vs Lender vs Appraiser: The DSCR Hunger Games

ricklahkar
4 days ago
1 min read

Broker: It’s 95% occupied, DSCR 1.35x—easy win Lender: Great, send T-12, clean rent roll, SNDAs, estoppels, Phase I, ALTA, and your kindergarten transcript Appraiser: Using comps from when Blockbuster paid rent—marking you to “reality” 🙂 Me 11:59pm pre-committee: co-tenancy nuke discovered, roof is vintage 1997, DSCR now 1.19x—rate cap sobbing Client: Can we close Friday? Me: Sure, right after I invent a new cap rate 🔥

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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