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When Rent Hits But the Roof Leaks: Property Manager Starter Pack

Owner: 'It’s passive income.' Me: passively sprinting to a 3am sprinkler alarm 🚨 Broker promised 'turnkey'; key turns nothing—TI request reads like War and Peace CAM true-up: me vs Excel vs a rogue snowplow invoice from 2021 Expectation: collect rent. Reality: chase COIs, decode SNDAs, and explain roofs aren’t CAM 😅

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CAM Reconciliation Speedrun Any% (Crying in Excel)

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Rent Roll Says 95%, Roof Says Bring a Bucket

Broker: Pro forma's mint, 95% occupied Property Manager: Occupied by who? Three shell suites and one raccoon 🤝 Lender: Need estoppels, SNDA, Phase I, and a time machine by Friday Me opening CAM recon

 
 
 

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