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The CRE Humor Jokes

When DSCR Says Yes But Appraisal Says Nah

Broker: DSCR pencils to 1.25x if we call 12 months free rent ‘stabilized’ Lender: Send final-final rent roll, SNDA, 12 estoppels, and your blood type 🧾 Appraiser: Best comp is a 2016 flex barn 42 miles away—same ‘vibes’ Me at 2:47 AM: Torturing Excel until TI/LC vanish and cap rate = faith-based underwriting 😵‍💫

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Term Sheet Says Yes, Appraisal Says LOL

Broker: LOI signed, lender nodding, I preorder the 'Closed' banner Lender: send updated T-12, live rent roll, and proof the roof isn’t a rumor Appraiser: found comps from a C-minus two zip codes away—

 
 
 

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