top of page
ChatGPT Image Mar 21, 2026, 05_41_11 PM.png

The CRE Humor Jokes

Underwriting vs Appraisal: Final Boss Property Tax

Broker: Pro forma says 6.75% cap, tenants 'sticky' Lender: Send T-12, T-3, estoppels, guarantor DNA, and your childhood GPA 🧮 Appraiser: Closest comp is a drive-thru 38 miles away, adjusted -0.01% because 'vibes' Me at 1:59 PM: 47-tab model pencils perfectly—until property taxes spawn like a final boss 🤡

Recent Posts

See All
Appraiser Brought a 2021 Comp to a 2026 Knife Fight

Broker: T12 scrubbed, 6-cap, Phase I squeaky. Let’s close. Lender: DSCR 1.249 so… escrows, rate cap, and a blood sample. Appraiser: Used a 'nearby' comp 19 miles away behind a cornfield—value: vibes.

 
 
 

Comments

Rated 0 out of 5 stars.
No ratings yet

Add a rating
bottom of page