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The CRE Humor Jokes

Underwriting Says Yes, Appraiser Says “Cute Spreadsheet”

Broker: DSCR 1.28x on my model—green light🧮 Lender: Cool, drop T-12, T-3, T-1, rent roll, estoppels, and your firstborn by EOD Appraiser: Pulled comps from 2018, 20 miles away, with ‘amenity: functional obsolescence’📉 Client: Great, 3% fixed, 80% LTV, 5yrs IO, closing Friday… right?

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