The DSCR Was 1.30 Until the Appraiser Opened Excel

Broker: DSCR's 1.30 on the T12, we're golden Lender: Upload rent roll, estoppels, SNDA, and your childhood report cards Appraiser: Comps from 2019, cap at 5.25% because 'vibes' 🧮 Client: Can we close Friday? Me: After the 12% value haircut and a fresh covenant tattoo? 😂