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The CRE Humor Jokes

The DSCR Diet: My Deal Lost 20% Leverage Overnight

Broker: Pro forma says 1.30x DSCR at 65% LTV, easy cap rate meal Lender: After T12, tax reset, and insurance tripled—0.99x and vibes Client: Cool, we still closing Friday? Me at 3am: deleted rent growth, summoned estoppels, offered kidney—Excel still returns #REF! 🧮😵‍💫

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Underwrote 6.25% Cap, Appraised at Lol

Broker: Underwrote 95% occupancy, totally conservative, pinky swear. Appraiser: Subject borders a haunted parking lot; -120 bps for vibes. Lender: Need T-12, T-36, T-everything, estoppel bingo, and a

 
 
 

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