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The CRE Humor Jokes

The Appraisal Came In… And So Did My Therapy Bill

Broker: LOI accepted, easy close Lender: need updated rent roll, 3 yrs CAM recs, and your childhood report card Appraiser: value assumes the Starbucks is immortal Me at 2:13 AM: rebuilt the model 7x, cap rate = vibes ☕️😵

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When the ALTA hits and your pro forma taps out

Broker: Off-market, 'light lift' 🧮 My model: 47 tabs, 19 IRR cases, cell G37 chained to a prayer Lender: Need refreshed Phase I, ALTA v3, estoppels, SNDAs, and your Q4 soul Seller: BTW NOI includes m

 
 
 

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