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The CRE Humor Jokes

NNN Angels, Demising Devils: Cap Rate Catfish

Broker: Easy NNN, 45-day close, tenants are angels Property Manager: One angel welded a pizza oven to the demising wall and pays in Dogecoin Lender: Need SNDA, estoppel, roof cert, and a Phase I addendum about the pizza church by EOD Me in Excel: If I unhide 17 tabs the IRR hits 18% šŸ˜µā€šŸ’«šŸ§®

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