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I Had a Deal Until Lenders & Appraisers Opened Excel
Broker: Pro forma shows 6.0% cap, DSCR 1.30x Lender: After taxes, reserves, and vibes... DSCR 1.01x Appraiser: Final value = 'nice try' 🧮 Me: Renegotiating TI, free rent, and my will to live
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See AllBroker: DSCR pencils at 1.30x Lender: After ‘minor adjustments’ it’s 1.09x Appraiser: 9.5% cap because parking is ‘aspirational’ Client: So we still at 70% LTV? Me: Updating the model for the 37th ‘fi
Client: Need a 6 cap in West LA with 80% LTV Me (Broker): Sure, and I'd like a unicorn that signs an SNDA Lender: Send updated rent roll, estoppels, ALTA, Phase I, and your firstborn Appraiser: Using
Broker: Underwrote 65% LTV at 6.25%, DSCR 1.35—light jog to close Lender: Cool, just need T-12, T-3, rent roll, your childhood report cards, and a Phase I by Friday Appraiser: Comps say $8.2M; your pr
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