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The CRE Humor Jokes

Expectation: 6 Cap. Reality: SOFR On Preworkout.

Expectation: 6 cap, 10-year money, TIs covered Reality: 5.1 cap, SOFR doing burpees, LL funds TIs with good vibes Lender: Send updated rent roll, estoppels, and your will to live Me in Excel at 2:13 AM: If I move CAM to recoveries, do IRR and happiness reappear šŸ§®šŸ˜‚

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Underwrote 6.25% Cap, Appraised at Lol

Broker: Underwrote 95% occupancy, totally conservative, pinky swear. Appraiser: Subject borders a haunted parking lot; -120 bps for vibes. Lender: Need T-12, T-36, T-everything, estoppel bingo, and a

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