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The CRE Humor Jokes

Due Diligence Speedrun: 30 Days of Nope

ricklahkar
Jul 1
1 min read

Expectation: Clean diligence, smooth close Reality: Phase I says 'possible UST', ALTA puts neighbor's dumpster easement in our drive aisle, taxes reset 60% day 1 😵 Lender: 'One more doc' = PML, PCA, flood cert, 12 estoppels, plus a 1997 zoning letter written in Wingdings Me underwriting: bumps insurance +80%, 'new roof' (installed 1998), DSCR evaporates 🔥

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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