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The CRE Humor Jokes

DSCR Says Yes, Appraisal Says New Phone, Who Dis

Sep 28

1 min read

Broker: DSCR pencils at 1.35x on my T-12 Lender: Perfect—just need 47 more comps, fresh rent roll, and your childhood diary Client: So we’re still closing Friday, right? Appraisal: Came in at "LOL, NO"; also add $400k TI/LC, SNDA drama, and a surprise Phase I on the parking lot 🤡

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Expectation: 30-Day Close. Reality: 30 Docs A Day.

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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