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The CRE Humor Jokes

DSCR Catfish: Excel Says 1.26x, Lender Says 'Cute'

Sep 5
1 min read

Broker: We’re at 1.25x DSCR, easy Lender: After we adjust for actuals, taxes, reserves, roof, and gravity Me in Excel: VLOOKUP to 'final_final2', accidental circular ref—still shows 1.26x 📉 Client: Can we hit a 5 cap? Me: Only if we add 'Other Income: Manifesting' 🫠

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