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The CRE Humor Jokes

DSCR 1.35 Until The Appraiser Showed Up

Broker: DSCR 1.35, 65% LTV, clean T-12—easy close Lender: Cool, just need 47 comps, a roof report, and proof taxes won’t reassess 🧮 Appraiser: Value subject to “market vibes,” pulled comps from a cornfield 28 miles away Client: We closing Friday? Me: After the haircut and tax reset, DSCR 1.11—bring emotional-support equity 😵‍💫

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