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The CRE Humor Jokes

Credit Committee Entered the Chat: LOI vs Reality

Broker: We’re clear to close Friday Lender: Pending credit committee, DSCR re-run, fresh ALTA, 3 estoppels, and a Phase I update Client: So... Friday? Me: Turning the PSA into a monthly subscription 😂

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Underwrote 6.25% Cap, Appraised at Lol

Broker: Underwrote 95% occupancy, totally conservative, pinky swear. Appraiser: Subject borders a haunted parking lot; -120 bps for vibes. Lender: Need T-12, T-36, T-everything, estoppel bingo, and a

 
 
 

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