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The CRE Humor Jokes

Broker Brain vs Lender Brain vs Appraiser Brain - Cap Rate Cage Match

May 27
1 min read

Broker: It’s a pristine 6-cap, NNN, pre-leased - slam dunk Lender: Need T-12, T-3, T-now, estoppels, SNDA, roof report, and your 3rd grade attendance 📑 Appraiser: After market-supported adjustments, value = vibes and a 7.94% cap My Excel: 31 tabs, 6 #REF!, DSCR whispers 1.18 then rage-quits 🫠 Client: We still closing Friday? Me: Sure - if Friday is post-ALTA, revised rent roll, and two cosmic extensions

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