top of page
ChatGPT Image Mar 21, 2026, 05_41_11 PM.png

The CRE Humor Jokes

When the Appraiser Brings a Calculator and a Ouija Board

Broker: IC approved - coast is clear Lender: Need fresh T-12, estoppels, SNDAs, Phase I addendum, and an ALTA from 1997 Client: DSCR is vibes-based, right? Also what’s an estoppel 🙂 Me: Modeled 6.25% debt; term sheet says SOFR + vibes + yield maintenance, and the appraiser summoned 3 comps from 2011 😵‍💫

Recent Posts

See All
When the ALTA hits and your pro forma taps out

Broker: Off-market, 'light lift' 🧮 My model: 47 tabs, 19 IRR cases, cell G37 chained to a prayer Lender: Need refreshed Phase I, ALTA v3, estoppels, SNDAs, and your Q4 soul Seller: BTW NOI includes m

 
 
 

Comments

Rated 0 out of 5 stars.
No ratings yet

Add a rating
bottom of page