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The CRE Humor Jokes

When the Appraisal Yeets Your Pro Forma and the Lender Brings Scissors

11 minutes ago

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Broker: Pro forma NOI $1.2M, easy $12M value, trust Lender: After T-12 haircuts, reserves, and vacancy, we’re at $9.3M—debt yield 10% or bust Appraiser: Extraordinary Assumption says $8.7M at a 6.75% cap—also, parking ratio vibes Client: Why is leverage dead? Me: Because spreadsheets have feelings now 🧮😬

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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