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The CRE Humor Jokes

Warm Shell vs Reality: Bring a Coat and a $120/SF TI

12 minutes ago

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Expectation: warm shell. Reality: cold core, one outlet, HVAC powered by hope. Client: "Open by July?" GC: "If July is a rumor." TI allowance: $35/SF; Drywall: $48/SF; My underwriting: Ctrl+Alt+Cry. Lender: "Prove DSCR at C.O." Me: "Before or after CAM true-up?" Lender: "Yes." 🤡

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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