Underwriting at 2:03 AM Because the Appraisal Thinks It’s 2016

Broker: Full ask, smooth close, vibes immaculate Lender: Need T-12, T-3, estoppels, SNDAs, rent roll in Latin, and DSCR that prays daily 🧮 Appraiser: We comped it to a cornfield flex from 90 minutes away because ‘market’ Me: Adding ‘Other Income—Oxygen’ to hit 1.25x while Excel fans whirr 😵