ChatGPT Image Mar 21, 2026, 05_41_11 PM.png

The CRE Humor Jokes

TI Budget vs Reality: Broker Math Meets GC Fees (send help)

Aug 31

1 min read

Client: We can do the build-out for $45/SF TI, right? GC: For the paint—if we skip walls, doors, and HVAC lead times 😬 Me in Excel: $45/SF + 12% GC fee + 15% contingency + “one tiny” CO = pro forma on fire 🧮 Landlord: CAM is just an estimate. Me: So is my delivery date

Recent Posts

See All

CAM True-Up: The Annual Jump Scare

Broker: Base rent looks dreamy Landlord: NNN is just light housekeeping, ignore the fine print January CAM true-up: 15% admin fee + 105% gross-up + snow removal... in Miami 🤡 Tenant: Wait, didn’t we

When the TI Budget Meets Reality: The Spreadsheet Screams

Broker: TI is “turnkey” GC: Cool, which key opens the $40/sf gap? Landlord: We’ll sort it at CAM reconciliation 🙂 Me in Excel: one circular ref and the rent roll time-travels to 2019 🧯

TI Budget vs Construction Reality vs CAM Plot Twist

Broker brain: $35/SF TI = glow-up GC: That buys doorknobs and an RFI about the doorknobs Landlord: CAM reconciliation arriving with interest and snow from 2021 My model in Excel: Rent +3%, change orde

The CRE Humor Jokes

Comments