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The CRE Humor Jokes

TI Allowance vs Reality: My Spreadsheet Needs Therapy

Sep 3
1 min read

Expectation: $60/SF TI = shiny build-out; Reality: buys a doorknob and vibes GC math: 8-week schedule = 8 months + 17 change orders + 3 unknown unknowns 😵 Landlord delivering vanilla shell; me receiving sugar-free, walls-optional cone Lender at 4:59pm: one last item = cost-to-complete, new appraisal, and my soul 🤔

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