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The CRE Humor Jokes

My Excel Said 6 Cap, IC Heard Fairy Tale

4 days ago

1 min read

Broker: LOI accepted—turnkey, light lift, day-1 cash flow Lender: Neat, please send T-12, rent roll, Argus, Phase I, ALTA, estoppels, and DSCR baby photos Client: Can we close Friday if we pivot to condo-hotel, add mezz, and keep the rate fixed at vibes? Me opening Excel: 🧮 Model says 1.25x—after one tiny rent concession, IC says myth; my sanity says bye 😬

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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