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The CRE Humor Jokes

Due Diligence Jenga: One More Estoppel And We're Out

Broker: LOI signed, PSA clean, we're cruising Lender: Need fresh estoppels, SNDA, ALTA, Phase I that says 'no vibes,' and a 1.35 DSCR in a 1.10 world šŸ˜µā€šŸ’« Buyer: Underwrote at 6.25% cap; Seller heard 4.00% cap + free parking for my descendants Attorney: Found a 1998 co-tenancy clause - if the RadioShack leaves, so can half the rent 🧨 Me (updating the model): T-12 says 'maybe'; T-3 says 'lol'; Excel says #REF! šŸ“‰

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