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The CRE Humor Jokes

Cap Rate Catfish vs DSCR Reality: Broker Brain Meltdown

3 days ago

1 min read

Expectation: 6.5% cap, 75% LTV, 30-day close Reality: DSCR 1.20 so 56% LTV, 2019 comps, Phase I says 'possible former gas station' Excel: circular reference boss fight 🧮; lender: 'send T-12 v9'; client: 'all cash if price drops' Me: refreshing rate sheets like it’s Black Friday while the 1031 clock screams 😵‍💫

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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