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The CRE Humor Jokes

Broker Promised “Clean” — Due Diligence Unlocked: Hard Mode

Aug 29

1 min read

Broker: 30-day DD, totally vanilla Lender: need Phase I, maybe Phase II, ALTA, seismic, estoppels, SNDA, and your childhood report cards Seller: ‘No issues’ — roof vendor shows up with a kayak, Phase I whispers ‘hello, UST’ 🚧 Me at 2:07am: DSCR pencils… until the survey adds 3 encroachments and a mystery easement 😂

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The CRE Humor Jokes

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