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The CRE Humor Jokes

Appraisal Came In: My Pro Forma Is Now Fan Fiction

Broker: 65% LTV on the term sheet šŸ“ˆ Appraiser: 2017 comps, cap rate from Narnia; value -11% Lender: DSCR thin—add recourse or a co-signer with a pulse Me at 2am: moving $0.09 to Other Income; deal resurrects after a 50 bps haircut šŸ˜‚

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Term Sheet Says Yes, Appraisal Says LOL

Broker: LOI signed, lender nodding, I preorder the 'Closed' banner Lender: send updated T-12, live rent roll, and proof the roof isn’t a rumor Appraiser: found comps from a C-minus two zip codes away—

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When the Appraiser Nukes Your Cap Rate at 4:59 PM

Broker: It pencils at 6.25% cap, T-12 trending up, pro forma tight Lender: Committee wants actuals, SNDAs, and my weekend Appraiser: Calls it 'stabilized' then shaves 12% because a 2009 comp sneezed M

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